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    Tuesday, September 16, 2008

    Target and Testosterone

    Target and testosterone went head-to-head on Saturday during Sweet Man and I's monthly voyage to the supreme sovereign of superstores.

    Now I must admit, it is one of my favorite trips to take with the love of my life. And talk about art imitating life...I get lots of novel ideas from these adventures... Give a man a bright red shopping cart with a bull's eye on the side and prepare to be amazed...and confused...

    I've come to the conclusion that it's not that men can't think...it's just that they do so with different body parts than women do and on a different level than we do, often requiring our help to arrive at the best decision. (And wow, I can't wait to get Sweet Man's thoughts on this. LOL!)

    Keep in mind, men often need our help because while they're attempting to negotiate the light bulb aisle, some hot, high voltage chick interrupts their thought process, forcing their body fluids to the wrong head. Following a brief, tit-for-tat reminder that we're looking for light bulbs and not headlights, we're on our way to the Halloween section.

    Oh yeah, by this time, Sweet Man's thinking nothing but women and witches. He's convinced the end cap display of artfully carved decorations showing a witch's ass after she's crashed her broom into a sign is quite apropos in its declaration that 'The Witch Is In' or 'The Witch Is Out"...but what a waste of paint, he says. Like they needed the 'out' message...

    After a trip to the liquor aisle to restock his gin and tonic supply, we head for the tampons, chocolate and coffee. Probably a good thing we picked up his gin first. Although, by this time, he's happy to indulge me with chocolates and Starbucks because anything beats the feminine products' shelves. Plus, the chocolate and coffee aisles are closer to the check-out and could mean we're almost done.

    Okay...here's the scoop...although I had fun writing that, I'll let you in on a little secret...Sweet Man lives up to his name on Target trips. Honestly, we do have a tremendous time at Target. He's the kindest, sweetest, most patient man I've ever met and taken on a Target run.

    He gives me the extra five minutes I need to decide between the Russell Stover dark chocolates and the Ghirardelli. He doesn't care if I get the Target brand (which I love and do on most things) or the name brand (which he prefers but is starting to forgo to try my beloved Target version). He doesn't mind if I buy a couple of Christmas things...in September. And he gives me no grief for buying things not on the list. Now that's one Sweet Man. And I'm one lucky, lucky girl.

    Sexy, Sassy, Smart Wishes --- D. D. Scott

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